To love her like Christ loves the church

We'll to begin, I guess this post is to married men but I suppose that if you aren't married then this is a bonu s to you so you will be able to start your marriage off the right way, God's way. 

As a married man of now three years, with three children, (one destroying my home, the other in my wife's belly and one in heaven), I can't act like the wise married man of 25+ years but I can share what wisdom the Lord brought me thus far. 

Learn to love her. Yes I said learn because it takes time to learn how much Christ loved His church. If you want to experience loving your wife the way He intended you must understand the love of a father. 

You see, when a man has a child and gets to hold in his arms something so precious, a treasure if you will, nothing makes you want to allow any harm to that little gift. You start caring above and beyond about safety, sympathy, care, and the love they desire from you. This is how our Father created your love to be for your wife. He created her perfectly and beautifully just for you, but like any father He desires that we treat His creation like He desires us to. A Father is scared of ever letting his beautiful little girl go into the hands of the wrong man so He earnestly prays and hopes that the right man will come along for her...this is how the Father treats his children too. However the interesting thing is He created the man too but it is up to the man to make the choice to love her respectfully and with a fiery passion that can only come from the intamacy the man has with the Lord. 

My wife Abigail has been put through the ringer with me and that's probably why I have this on my heart to share so that other men would learn a lesson from my mistakes. 

Put God first and then her directly next even before your children. You were given eternity by believing that Christ died for you on the cross...that was a gift out of grace and mercy. Then you were given HER. So if you think for a moment that maybe you don't have what you want In life, remember that you have been given the greatest gifts already. When man finds a wife he finds a good thing. 

Don't allow the world to tell you different and don't just take my words. Read what the scriptures have to say and let them be your guide. 

Always remember that she is your first ministry before anything else you do for the Lord. Don't allow what the modern day church has and continues to do by showing that there is no higher calling than to serve all your days in church ministry... I fell into that and many times thought my marriage would eventually fail. She comes first after your time with Christ...always! 

Is this hard to do? I shouldn't have to even tell you. But the most rewarding thing that you will gain from this is simply the love that was created for you to share by the Most High. 

Always,

Michael 

Sinking Sand

A reality that hopefully you won't have to go through is the feeling of sinking into the idolatry of man. If you indeed have a relationship with Jesus, and I mean "real"ationship, I pray that this will help you along the way of serving a living Creator and not an idea of one. It is very easy to fall into idolatry whether it is in material things, image, or a person. The hardest thing is realizing when you  have committed it, and changing because of it. Christ desires to be number one, not a close second to whatever you have placed so highly in your life. True we want to trust in people, sometimes we want to be dependent because of the fear that we cant experience God on the level we want to alone, but the TRUTH is, we don't ask. The scriptures very clearly say knock and the door will be opened to you, but the deeper look is spiritual, not so much material. Don't get me wrong if the Lord of Hosts blesses you because of your faithful service, then praise Yahweh, but the Lord wants relationship. Intimate, real, and pure relationship.

I myself have fallen into idolatry. I have made a man that I looked up to for years, who also has taught me and led me in my walk to Christ an idol that I sadly have placed in many respects even above my relationship with Jesus. I must say that it was very easy. I didn't think twice, in fact I never saw it coming. I thought that maybe I was walking closer to the Lord because of my devoted heart to learn from this man. The truth is, I have never been so far away from the Lord. I haven't given my heart to that first true love that is Jesus.

The point of this post is simply this. Don't let your fear of what man may think of you become more important than what God thinks of you. Your fear should be in the Lord who created you. Your relationship with Him matters more than any relationship on this earth. And yes if your married, more than your wife. The Bible says to love your wife like Christ loves the church, but nowhere does it say that God comes second. Not one place.

If you are struggling with this same trial in your life. I pray that this will help you sit back and take a close look at your relationship with Jesus. Your relationship with Him is "everything".

Sincerely,
Michael

The Real Life Of A Pastor

So this being my first blog post, I assume that not many people will be reading it, but for those who do, just know that these are the true feelings and thoughts from my heart and not the ones that you might hear stated from a pastor who wants to lead you to believe that there are nothing but happy thoughts and vibes when serving the Lord as a pastor in a church.

This is the real me. 

I worked very hard for the better part of three years to become a pastor and only to say that what I thought I saw in every pastors life, you know the (Big fake smiles, sympathy handshakes, side hugs, and "can I pray for you statements") were just a front in most of the pastors I met to cover up the very real fact that serving God...is...hard. 

People come to sunday service, mid-week service, or small groups to get fed some knowledge of the bible, also tacking on a slew of personal problems that they believe the pastors of the church can truly take care of. What they don't understand is that pastors are the biggest targets of issues of us all. We try to take the burdens of our own lives and pack on the burdens of others as well. This isn't easy. Many pastors will say the Lord will take your problems for you and that is the truest statement because not one pastor including myself can carry the weight of the church and survive. If they do, their marriages end up suffering, their kids suffer, and their own personal sanity goes out the window. You might even hear a pastor say just rest in the Lord. A statement that packs on often unstated questions like, "what the heck does that even mean"? or "how could I possibly rest in all of my problems"? 

The truth is that when things are brought to pastors we try to counsel only from what we know of the bible and personal experience. How could a mere man fix someones personal problems like marriage, finances, or intimacy with God? The answer is...we cant. But God can. 

The reason that I am talking about the life of a pastor is because it is straight freaking hard. And if I told you or showed you those fake smiles and handshakes of sympathy I would consider myself a hypocrite of the life I want to live for Jesus. This post is to open wide the eyes of those outside ministry and even to some within ministry about the trueness of what serving God entails. It is beyond hard but most satisfying when you experience His true grace and pure love. 

This is me. I'm transparent about my walk with God because I will not be fake. I will not be the pastor who tells you when you accept Christ into your life that its easy going, happy, full of joy, and nothing but love. Accepting Christ is the hardest decision anyone can make cause it takes true sacrifice and not many people want to give all of themselves to experience what God has. But I tell you the truth, from my life, that even with all the hard times, stories of peoples lives of life from death in addiction, affairs, lies, and all other life experiences in being a pastor or in ministry at all...God is worth it. 

You may not find that a life with Christ is all Joel Olsteen, with the big fake smiles. You may and most likely will find hardships and trials that truly test you and push you to be the best you can be but in the end...you still have a loving Father, Jesus Christ, and the free gift of eternity. 

I'm Michael, and I'm a pastor, a husband, a father of three (one of which is in heaven, the other in my wife's belly, and one currently destroying my house), a skateboarder, a metalhead, and prayerfully a good friend to those who call me theirs. 

This is my story.

This is my life with more to come.

Thanks for reading.